Coping with Bereavement by Hamish McIIwraith

By Hamish McIIwraith

An up-to-date model of this delicate and empathetic advisor, which mixes sensible recommendation with emotional help to provide a framework for the rebuilding of lifestyles after bereavement. Drawing on his personal adventure, the writer describes the grieving approach, whereas masking the simpler components corresponding to paperwork and funerals; additionally supplied is a complete checklist of aid teams and corporations the world over.

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Women tend to live longer than men, and also to marry older men. By the age of seventy-five two-thirds of women have lost their husbands. Many women in this position, probably quite rightly, feel threatened and physically at risk. If you haven’t already done so, install a chain on your door, and a fish-eye peephole, so that you can check on people who are calling. Put locks on all of the windows. Always ask to see the cards of any officials or workmen. If in doubt, call up their offices to be quite sure that they are legitimate.

If in doubt, call up their offices to be quite sure that they are legitimate. ) Don’t be put off by people complaining that you’re being ‘difficult’; you’re just being safe. You could consider getting a dog. Get to know your neighbours, and let them know when you’re going away so they can keep an eye on your place. A telephone is an essential tool in keeping in touch with 36 ◆ Death and the Grieving Process officials and friends. Think seriously about getting a phone/fax machine, or a computer with a modem and e-mail (if you haven’t got one already) as this makes communication easier.

If you can, take a nap. If not, sit in a quiet room and talk to someone you know well about the way you feel; there will be plenty time to deal with funeral arrangements and financial and legal obligations later. The first week You will probably be too busy to think deeply about your grief in the first week. There is an enormous amount to do. Uppermost in people’s minds at this time is the funeral. It provides a focus and purpose in the first days. Depending on the circumstances surrounding the death you may be able to proceed quite quickly with the funeral arrangements.

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